10-2-03

I don't really know why, but I feel complete. I feel like a whole person. I'm finally happy, and everything is working well in my life. I can smile just because it's a beautiful day, not because something great happened to me. I think I might actually be fitting in. I know it's hard to believe, but it's happening. I'm so much more relaxed. I used to worry about everything, and that my life wasn't living up to other people's. Being single doesn't even phase me anymore. I'd rather be able to pay attention to myself than having to listen to someone else out of obligation. And that's what I'm doing, I'm paying attention to myself. I swear, the new me is going places. They might not be up, but at least I'll be moving.

10-7-03

Oh my god... pretty much an extremely bad day. School was bad, latin especially. But Katharine and I had fun, she's teaching me sign language. It's really cool, and I think it's actually proof that I'm retaining knowledge. I didn't think it was possible, but you never know. Oh, and the bus ride home just made me want to kill someone. Not myself you see, because if I killed myself than the world would never know the wonderful and modest person that I am. Anyway, we've got one of the smaller buses again, because the other one broke down, and this county is too cheap to have an extra bus just in case. Now, we normally fill up one of the bigger buses. So you can imagine what might happen if you took that number of people, plus a few more, and then cram them in a Volkswagon Golf. Not a pretty picture is it? So then I got home and I just finished watching Being John Malkovich. I swear, it is like my second favorite surreal fantasy movie. Behind Donnie Darko of course. It's got the sort of same set up. And it's got John Cusack in it, which makes it a masterpiece. The dude knows acting. And it also has Cameron Diaz playing a really ugly like transgender lesbian sort of woman. She's having an affair with a woman while she's in John Malkovich's head. Kind of weird isn't it? But it's so great, and so humbling. And seeing Cameron Diaz ugly isn't too bad either. It's almost comforting. Anyway, not much else to say. I'm really tired. I also found out that besides DJ, I'm like the only person that's happy that Kyle is back. I don't really understand it. Oh well, I'm kind of drained. I'll be at the bonfire tonight, so if anyone else is going, I'll see you there!

10-14-03

Okay, so I haven't updated in a while. Get over it. I was on vacation. I had to go up to Maine to close up the cabin, so I have an excuse. It was actually pretty nice. We went hiking at Grafton Notch, and went to Moose Cave Gorge. Story has it that a moose fell into a cave about a hundred years ago and couldn't get out. Eventually a hunter found it and put it out of its misery. Poor moose. Oh well, my mom almost hit a deer when we were driving back from Naples. And she pretty much ran off the road by the summer camp. We had some pretty intense fog on Saturday and Sunday. You could barely see from one side of a two lane highway to the other. Kind of creepy really. But Monday it was really clear and you could see all the way to Mt. Washington, which by the way, has snow on top. Totally cool right? Well, I thought so. I hope we have a really bad winter though, because not only do I want to try out my snowboard, my dad promised that if we had an entire week of school off we would go up to Maine. Beat that ski trip preps! Yeah, so it doesn't have underage drinking, but good food, good people, the most beautiful place on earth... it all adds up in the end. Anyway, some fun little websites for you guys this week. Sebago Cam Check it out during the day, there's not exactly a lot to see at night. Sunsets are always good too. I'm gonna have to start posting pictures soon. I've got a ton from last summer.

10-21-03

So, can we all just be happy that I'm updating, instead of leading you on with the false hope that something actually happened in my life? Probably not. Anyway, a lot of things have happened, I just haven't felt like posting them, and when I do, I usually wait so long that I've forgoten what happened. And again, I pretty much forgot what happened today. Although I do remember that last night I had a really weird dream. And this morning's PSAT wasn't as bad as it could have been, and I guess it was better than gym. Although I hated the fact that we only had an hour in W8. We have yet to finish Casablanca. I finally figured out who Taylor's boyfriend is, and will now refer to him as Chad, just to piss off Taylor, even though is name is Drew. I don't understand what people have against the name Chad. A lot of hot guys are named Chad. Chad Michael Murray anyone? The perfect example of course, and he looks really good without a shirt on... Wow, okay, that was weird. Yeah, so anyway, that was pretty much all of my day. Oh, and as soon as I got home I watched a couple hours of Scrubs and Popular. God I love Tv! Especially when it's at my mercy...